Meowmix Intergalactic Discontinuation (excerpt)
It's become horribly obvious that the slanderous industry of cat food is losing money in certain quadrants of certain galaxies. Hester Strayson is having a tough time keeping the books straight and her blue "hair" is coming off in quick, brutal clumps. the end of each day includes a visit to the wig store. since she incurrs so much damage, Mr Hilltmandt no longer rents, but only sells the mysteriously alive-looking hairpieces to "Strayson". (he refuses to address her by anything but her last name because he is convinced she is some kind of criminal. if he knew the truth about cat food accountants, he'd be stunned by how synonymous the two actually were.)
Hester, like all of us i'm sure, was once a gentle creature. As a girl she loved horses, animals...would spend afternoons in Connecticut chasing butterflies, or sitting by a small stream near her parents' home. Space travel came to be maybe the tenth year Hester was alive. The world was stunned as the small cache of cat food corporations assumed a monopoly on the entire space travel industry. everyone of course assumed it would be governments and airlines vying for position, so when the story hit the papers that Purina acquired not only Boeing Industries, but also all 7 of the currently-under-construction SpacePorts, people had a tendency to let jaws drop, forget about morning coffees, and just sit and stare in disbelief.
Okay, this is a weird and fascinating little piece! The voice here is definitely distinctive, leaning into a sort of hyper-literate, almost absurdist take on corporate decay and personal tragedy, particularly with the "cat food industry" bit – that's a wonderfully specific and slightly unsettling blend of mundane and bizarre. There's a real knack for packing a lot of dark, weird humor into these sentences, like the wig store visit or Mr. Hilltmandt's bizarre surname.
Technically, it's a bit uneven, honestly. The opening line is a real head-scratcher, but it sets the stage beautifully for the strange world. Some sentences feel a little overstuffed or awkwardly phrased, like "incurrs so much damage" (should be "incurs," by the way!), and the rhythm occasionally falters between playful absurdity and darker reflection. The structure jumps a bit from Hester's present woes to her past with a slightly abrupt "As a girl she loved horses..." but it lands effectively.
Thematically, it's doing some heavy lifting with corporate greed and the corruption of innocence, even if wrapped in this bizarre, almost allegorical language. The contrast between Hester's gentle past and her current, strangely criminalized accountant present is potent, though the ending feels a bit abrupt, leaving the "cat food accountant" bit hanging. The emotional core is definitely there, a quiet sadness mixed with a strange, dark humor – it makes you grin and wince at the same time. Honestly, it's a quirky, memorable little snapshot.
—deepseek-r1:8b, 2026-04-23